Realization

I'm sitting in the sun.  The television is tuned to Easy Listening.  I'm day dreaming about our upcoming trip to Florida.  All incontrovertible proofs that the secret stalker has caught up with me.  When exactly did I become old?  Contemporary music used to be my forte (okay, so I've always had a warm spot for the sixties oldies, but that's totally understandable and youthful, right?). Sitting in m recliner at 1:40 never used to be an option.  And what could be more cliched than going to Florida for someone my age?  Ah well, dotage doesn't seem such a bad thing!
Having written this, I realize that instead of being a veiled attempt at humor, it might be closer to the truth than I want it to be!  I really believe growing old is a choice (unlike growing older, which is a blessing and totally unavoidable if I want to be present!).  I just changed the tv to golden oldies (and am doing the locomotion with little Eva)!  I'm about to do a little consumerism (got my broomstick out and will fight with the company that wants me to pay the same bill twice), and am planning hikes I want to take while we are in Florida!  Take that, you silent stalker!  This 14 year old is ready to take on the world.  Now, if I can only remember where the car keys are!  Know you are loved!

homoymns, synonyms, and antonyms, oh my!

Weight...Wait.  I have never had a handle on either of these.  The epitome of Duncan toys has nothing on my avoirdupois over the last years of my life.  Understand, from college graduation onward, I had enjoyed the 70 pounds I had gained while working at the snack bar in college.  I carried it well (or so I tell myself).  Then, the spirit took me and I quit smoking and lost 70 pounds.  Put it back on.  Lost 65 pounds.  Put it back on.  Lost 75 pounds.  Have been inching up again.  This time, I've decided to attempt to nip the full monty gain more quickly.  For those of you who haven't caught it yet, I'm dieting again!  But here's the thing.  I can't wait until I can eat bread and potatoes again.  And I can't wait for my body to decide it would rather be healthily thinner than comfortably fatter.  But I guess I shall.

Stubborn...German.  The reason I think I can lose the inches I have found.  Miss Loosewheel used to say that if I got up in the morning determined to do something, before I went to bed that night, I would have done it, come Helen Highwater (I think that's what she said.  My mother never would have said hell...oh wait, yes she would have!).  Besides which, we are going to Florida in two and a half weeks and I want to look good in my bathing suit.  Okay, I want to be able to wear my bathing suit without causing uproariously laughter.  Okay, I actually want to be able to walk on the beach in my bathing suit without Captain Ahab harpooning me and celebrating his final victory!  And so it is written, and so it shall be done!

Love...Hate.  I hate dieting.  I love eating.  I hate gaining weight.  I love losing weight.  I hate that I have to assuage my desire for pie with low carb cole slaw.  I love that I have found an amazing recipe for low carb cole slaw!  Can you tell it's lunchtime?

Here it is in a nutshell.  Waiting is over.  The weight comes off.  Teutonically speaking, I shall eschew carbs until Florida.  And for what it's worth, I hate the fact that Duncan ever invented the yo yo to describe my shape, but I love you!

Early morning discovery

It was a late night.  First thing this morning, I go to the basement, measure the coffee into the filter, turn on the Mr. Coffee, print off the habitual crossword puzzles, come back upstairs and hunker down on the couch in the man cave to watch news of the Olympics.  Amazing time of the year for me.  I am a true junkie, and am somewhat concerned about the readiness and safety issues for all participants and their present fans.  Can't wait any longer for coffee.  Head to the basement.  Realize that coffee is easier to drink when you pour the water in the reservoir and not leave it in the pot!  Sometimes, sharing the agony of defeat lessens the pain.  But stupidity, unfortunately, is it's own reward!  Hope your grounds and water meet on your first try, and know you are loved!

Viagra Falls

Is it just I, Or are you also tired of hearing/seeing adds about sexual dysfunction?  I remember when ED was a talking horse, and there was no need to talk about my testosterone levels.  Whose business is it, exactly, whether when "the mood" hits me I am prepared to do something about it?  (And what's with those bathtubs?). There are certainly enough areas in my life where I am inadequate, and yet I don't hear ads about a little blue pill it increase my patience, or an underarm dose that will increase my adeptness at playing the piano.  Likewise, I don't care to hear about odor or that nagging itch for the ladies!  Being somewhat research oriented, I am going to keep track for the next week how many times one of these "personal" ads airs.  I bet you can hardly wait for the results.  I'd say more, but as a very good friend of mine once opined, "bz, it 's time for your medicine!"  Less personally yours, I remain standing straight (for over four hours without consulting a physician!), able to motate on my own, and blissfully unaware of any offensive odors!  And you are loved!

Preparation H

Community U. is, in my estimation, an amazing offering to all of us in the community.  Diversity reigns supreme in the offerings, and the expected commitment from the students is limited to one night.  What a great way to get a little knowledge, have time with friends, and challenge the instructors to find a way to teach a subject in one offering!  Cath and I are two of those instructors.  Tomorrow night, I will be teaching a class entitled No Need to Knead.  Yup.  Bread.  A week from tomorrow night, the two of us will be offering a class in beginning pinochle!  How's that for diversity?  It's been a while since we have been in the classroom.  I had forgotten how much of any class relies on preparation!  Tonight is dedicated to getting different stages of bread ready to show.  ALL night.  Each of the two breads has three different stages to go through, and it will only be fair for the students to see each stage!  That makes timing integral, and since one of the breads is a 16-18 hour investment in time (about 10 minutes of actual work!), planning does take the upper hand!  We'll see if we can pull it off!  Hopefully, these students will find the preparation Helpful, Handy, and end up Happy!  If not, it could be a royal pain in the...well, that would be a different Preparation H!  Know you are loved!

The big game

It's finally here.  After all the hype, the pomp and circumstance, the ads...the national anthem has been sung and we are underway.  At least that is what I have been told.  For some reason, my television doesn't get the game (that reason would be I don't tune it in!). I've never been a football fan.  The hype interests me.  I may tune in to see who Bruno Mars is but probably not.  I do have a favorite in the game.  Mr. Manning has always impressed me as a decent man, and I hear he's had an amazing year...and he's mature!  I like mature people!  But that's the end of the interest.  There will probably be a movie on that will pique my interest, or I may just doze a bit.  However, if you are a fan, I hope your team plays well, the game is exciting, and no one gets hurt!  And after the next month or so, we will hear little of this game...I hope!  Have an amazing week and know you are loved!

The February rhyme

I'm sick of wind, I'm sick of cold
It makes me crabby now I'm old
If I'd one wish, 'twould be this thing:
We'd skip the rest, head straight to spring.

Alas as long as we stay here
The warmer weather's not too near
The grass so green, the sidewalk clean?
A dream that's soon not likely seen!

I suppose I could be quick and droll
And blog about the Super Bowl
Or maybe mention for a thrill
The nerve of Punxsutawney Phil.

Suffice it now to hunker down
Erase that nasty niggling frown
And if I'm quick and if I'm wary
I might find good in February!

It is the month my wife was born
The sun comes earlier each morn
St. Valentine we celebrate
So with my candy don't be late!

The best news that I can report
Is month like this?  Thankfully short!
And even though the weather sucks
I love you lots, you bet your bucks!

Now, aren't you glad this isn't a rhyme a day site?  Think Thaw!